Sugar Daddies: A sweet deal
When I first moved to Los Angeles and became a full-time student I was struggling with rent, tuition fees, and all sorts of bills. As I was sitting on a bed without a frame, eating noodles for $1 a pack; my friend introduced me to the term "sugar daddy." A sugar daddy, or mommy, is usually an older, rich man or woman, who provides support in form of expensive gifts-paying your bills, etc. In short terms the sugar daddy assures that you are a well kept young being.
That completely sounded like the ideal man to me, since I'm not dating younger guys anyway. (In frantic times, your mind will think radical thoughts that you are not willing to own up to in retrospection.)
Being a sugar baby sounds an awful lot like prostitution in many people's ears, given that the baby is offering companionship and intimacy to an affluent man/woman and in return living a wealthier life.
In this case, however, both parties are looking for a mutual beneficial relationship. Even babies need intimacy and affection, and the mommies or daddies often want a younger and attractive trophy that they can spoil.
There are several websites where you can find these wealthier people. Seekingarrangement.com states that, "It's human nature for people to want younger and more attractive partners. It's also natural for younger men & women to seek out more experienced, sophisticated partners, specifically those who have the means of providing them with comforts and luxuries."
These websites are just like regular dating sites, except that the members are more specific about their needs. There is no prostitution allowed on Seekingarrangements.com. They state that it is "strictly forbidden to ask for compensation for the purpose of meeting."
You get to state exactly what kind of relationship you are looking to have with the daddy or mommy and how much financial assistance you acquire.
"It's nice to know that all my expenses are paid for," says Maria, 23, who asked the Corsair not to run her last name. She graduated from Santa Monica College last year and is now trying to get her Bachelor Degree with the help of a sugar daddy. "But attraction is necessary," she continues. "We both know what we want and have a good understanding of each other's needs."
Maria has been in a relationship with her sugar daddy for five months now and has never had a doubted the relationship. "He pays for my tuition fees, my car payments, and my rent," says Maria. This gives her more freedom with her own money and she never has to stress out about bills.
Since this is a relationship where both are happy with the arrangements, how could it be wrong? If the man/woman has the bread, why wouldn't he/she be able to share it with the individual they are seeing?
However, the potential sexual favors and the exchange of money could easily turn a relationship like this from a mutually beneficial arrangement into prostitution.
Then there is the fact that all relationships are different. There have been dream scenarios where the relationship actually has turned into a marriage, and there have been situations where the exchange has only happened once.
Where do we draw the line of prostitution and how do we know which sugar daddy/babe relationship has turned into something more?
I never got so far that I took action; a simple thought was enough for me to realize that I would never be comfortable with anything that involves money for sex.
It all comes down to the fact that in both the street-walker and the ‘sugar daddy relationship' there is a business deal that involves intimacy and money, which, according to the law, makes it prostitution. If you receive money you can be pretty sure that you have to work for it, and if you are working from your back, then that occupation is likely classified as prostitution.